tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post7554364576667410005..comments2024-01-05T12:13:21.588-05:00Comments on Cowgirl Up!: You Knew You Were Having a Downs Baby and You Didn't Terminate? How to Respond to Rude, Crude and Crazy CommentsJenny Dawnhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-49205045694792117852013-05-07T22:15:49.640-04:002013-05-07T22:15:49.640-04:00Definitely going to use this one!!!!Definitely going to use this one!!!!Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-62566755567856251422013-05-07T22:15:38.288-04:002013-05-07T22:15:38.288-04:00#1 is the one that sticks in my mind and I like De...#1 is the one that sticks in my mind and I like Deborah's response below "Did you mean to say that out loud?"-- might have to use that one too!!! :-) I also like your idea of asking them why they want to know. I'm going to use that one and see where the conversation goes. I'm glad you liked the list-- the Friendship Circle Blog is such a great resource!!Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-35406561557055364962013-05-07T22:13:47.881-04:002013-05-07T22:13:47.881-04:00Isn't it weird how real it is? I had no idea t...Isn't it weird how real it is? I had no idea this kind of prejudice existed. This kind of judgment. I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. Tell Spiderman hello from Super Joe!! Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-50489193769351896502013-05-07T22:12:48.093-04:002013-05-07T22:12:48.093-04:00I hope you never have this kind of encounter, but ...I hope you never have this kind of encounter, but I hope this list helps everyone feel a little more prepared for the unexpected comment!! :-)Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-54379283098233807742013-05-07T22:12:08.047-04:002013-05-07T22:12:08.047-04:00I like your idea, Anna!!! Kind of like those cards...I like your idea, Anna!!! Kind of like those cards they give out in a soccer game-- red card, yellow card-- I think we just need a "rude" card to hand out with their precious pictures on one side!!!Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-65640997745903970112013-05-07T22:11:12.197-04:002013-05-07T22:11:12.197-04:00I think you are exactly right-- some things are be...I think you are exactly right-- some things are better left unsaid. I have tried to keep that in mind when I am in a situation that I am not familiar with. Instead of feeling like I have to say something I know try to think about whether I really need to say anything at all. Thank you for your note!!Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-49245819700840405412013-05-07T22:09:55.371-04:002013-05-07T22:09:55.371-04:00I'm so glad you haven't been asked since--...I'm so glad you haven't been asked since--there is definitely a "thing" out there about people who knew and chose to have their children anyway. I have also heard some parents who did not have testing performed and they received similar responses asking them why they didn't test. Jenny Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14606622799302380804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-84780447504540928602013-05-02T00:01:18.596-04:002013-05-02T00:01:18.596-04:00One of the best responses I've heard was "...One of the best responses I've heard was "Did you mean to say that out loud?"Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09211537058262061608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-72179976573103887952013-04-29T00:16:02.654-04:002013-04-29T00:16:02.654-04:00It just floors me that people actually say such th...It just floors me that people actually say such things. I get asked all the time if we knew. I always wonder why they want to know, and in the back of my mind it seems like it HAS to be because their thoughts are going in that direction. So perhaps I will start asking why they want to know. But answering like I do, like Tricia, it usually ends the conversation. But lately I have been keeping it going by telling the person that I am glad that I didn't know and why. But in this context I would have to seriously be held back. I'm not a violent person, but my initial thought is that I may just come out swinging. Or saying something horribly rude. I think I'm going to have to put #4 in my pocket, just in case. In the meantime, I'll practice my sweet smile with #1. Thanks for posting these comments. Too much of the time we are left dumbfounded.Leahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08985688905432556253noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-66265717887940814682013-04-26T15:11:23.816-04:002013-04-26T15:11:23.816-04:00Most people are sympathetic when the parent didn&#... Most people are sympathetic when the parent didn't 'know' the child had special needs prior to birth. However if you dare to have a child KNOWING they have a disability, that's a whole nother crowd right there. We usually don't encounter bias when it comes to Spidermans special needs, because he suffered brain damage due to medical Mal-practice. So we didn't 'do' it. However I've seen Spidermans special needs classmates treated horribly because they were 'born with it'. It's completely weird but it's definitely real.Melissahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15698048718456255433noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-73523348965998259522013-04-24T15:42:25.587-04:002013-04-24T15:42:25.587-04:00I, thankfully, have not encountered anyone like th...I, thankfully, have not encountered anyone like this... But I am sure the time will come. And when it does I will remember your list of responses and may just utilize all ten lol Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-26454437711164051142013-04-24T15:11:19.188-04:002013-04-24T15:11:19.188-04:00Whoa! I cannot believe people have asked that. . ...Whoa! I cannot believe people have asked that. . . not only once but twice. What the hell is wrong people? I wonder if I don't get that because Chunky Chicken was hiding away her extra chromosome until birth. Seriously, I just. . . Grrr! I am so angry. I want to say #4 when I hear inconsiderate things but I tend to just stand there open mouthed and silent. I have all sorts of saucy comebacks after the situation and they are long gone. I think that perhaps we all need to carry a little pamphlet showing the awesomeness of Joey/Ellie/Kamdyn and facts about Ds and facts about their rudeness to hand people when their ignorance runs along the extraordinarily rude side. Then I can be silent and just shove the pamphlet in their face.Anna Theurerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06937391910402532608noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-71993261457269602282013-04-24T10:09:39.860-04:002013-04-24T10:09:39.860-04:00SO proud of you!!!! I think you are educating a wh...SO proud of you!!!! I think you are educating a whole lot of people on the "mystery" of Down Syndrome. I also hope people, although a right to speak their mind, do not make uneducated comments or questions because they want to seem concerned. Sometimes it is better left unsaid if you do not understand what you are talking about.<br />XOXO<br />MMAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5931339813365183751.post-8287789543238002972013-04-24T08:41:17.382-04:002013-04-24T08:41:17.382-04:00I have only ever had a do ment about terminating o...I have only ever had a do ment about terminating once when Kamdyn was about 6 weeks old. I was shocked too. I have never been asked since. But now that I thi k about it, I get asked a lot if we knew while I was pregnant. Since we didn't, the conversation always ends there. It makes me wonder if people would go there if we had known. teal915https://www.blogger.com/profile/14813778503107953220noreply@blogger.com